Q: What did the Queen give Fergie for her Birthday?
A: A first class trip to Paris with dinner at the Ritz!

Q: What did Di and Dodi drink at the Ritz before the fatal car crash?
A: 4 Harvey WALLBANGERS and 2 SLAMMERS, followed by 6 CHASERS!!!

Q: After the RADIO, what was Di on next?
A: The Dashboard the Windscreen, Roof...etc!
 
Q: Why is Dodi's Penis Red?
A: Because he dipped it in Di!!!
 
Q: Why was Di in a Mercedes that night?
A: Because she didnt want to be seen dead in a Volvo!!!
 
Q: Whats the difference between Di and Tiger Woods?
A: Tiger Woods has a better driver!!!

Q: What was the last thing to go through Di's mind when she hit the wall?
A: Her arsehole.

Q: What's the difference between princess di and the NFL teams?
A: The NFL teams came out of the tunnel on Sunday!

  Elton John is going to rename his tribute song "Door handle through her Grin!!!

  Dodie to bodyguard..Wanna come with me and Di in the car tonite!!!

Q: What does Diana stand for?
A: Dead In A Nasty Accident.

  My wife kept complaining that I never took her on vacation, so I decided to take her to Paris      and give her the royal treatment...

Q: What did Princess Di say to Dodi after he gave her the Ring?
A: Aren't we moving a bit to fast!!!
 
Q: How do you paint a tunnel
A: With Di.

Q: Why did Elton John sing at the funeral?
A: Because he's the only queen who gives a shit!!

   Dodi's Tomb was to be fitted with central heating until they
   realised that he already had a radiator on his chest..

Q: What is the Difference between Di and Mother Theresa?
A: About 4 Days!!

  Di and Dodi are in the car on the way home from a night out on the
  town in Paris. Di says to Dodi "Why don't we stay at my place tonight?".
  Dodi replies "No, I insist we stop at my place.". So Dodi and Di
  proceed to have a big argument about this, at which point the driver
  turns round and says "Look, if you can't decide, why don't we just
  crash here for the night?"!

Q: What happened to the fairy Princess when the clock struck Twelve?
A: She turned into a PILLAR!!!

Q: Whats Diana and a tampon got in common??
A: They both go in dark holes and come out red...

    Mercedes has issued new safety stickers for their rear view mirrors -
      "PAPARRAZI IN THE MIRROR APPEAR CLOSER THAN THEY ARE"

Q: What does DODI stand for ?
A: Died Opposite DI.

Q: What do Diana and George Burns have in common?
A: They both died at 100.

Q: What does Pink Floyd, Senna and Di have in common?
A: They all had Hits with the WALL!!

     There are some unfounded rumours that the British Secret Service killed
     Diana.  It's completely untrue!  The French underground did it!!

     When Dodi asked Diana to marry him, she said that she needed something
     more concrete in her life.

Q: What was the last thing Diana said to the paparazzi?
A: No more pictures, I'm a bloody Princess!!!

Q: What was the last thing Di said before she died?
A: These photographers are going to drive me up a wall.

Q. What do Ferrero Rocher  and Princess Di have in common?
A. They both come out of France in a box.

Q: What is harder than getting red wine out of your carpet ?
A: Getting Di out of your upholstery !